My Little Pony Flashing Life TRACK 06 VERSE 04

Verse 4

SONG: Break The Targets (Super Smash Bros Melee) www.youtube.com/watch?v=waMXTr…

So I went to the training grounds and saluted the appointed guard for entry into the grounds. I picked up a training staff and began hitting targets for precision training. They were put up on wooden dummies and set in positions where vital areas of enemies would be. They were all rather durable and the trick was to break them as quickly as possible with adequate speed, precision, and power. Simple enough, right? Well yeah, but like I said, they were made of tough stuff. At least it was a good way to blow off steam.

Flash: The prince is a jerk! My brother’s here and I just KNOW he’s gonna try something stupid! And I’m SICK AND TIRED of getting sympathy! *Starts hitting harder and faster, making the targets shatter* I’m not weak or pathetic! So stop treating me like a kid! *Panting* Huh… Drum Role was right. Sometimes yelling your frustrations out DOES help you feel better. Thank goodness nopony was around…. I have got to stop talking to myself…… Starting NOW!

SONG: Metal Battle (Super Smash Bros. Melee) www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fo_OCQ…

So after a good 20 minutes of solo target practice, I was about to take a breather until I get blind-sighted by one of the dummies that for some reason came to life and started moving! They were glowing with a blue magic aura and all of them decided to charge at me to attack! I was outnumbered and it wasn’t long before I was overwhelmed.

Flash: Crud! CRUD!!! *Tries to fight them all off* You’re all supposed to be dummies! You’re not supposed to move! What’s wrong with you!? *Takes hit after hit* AAAGH! OOF! POOOGH! *Gets knocked away and hits the ground* PAAAAAH!!!  *Is dizzy while seeing the statues close in* I must be going crazy or something… *Sees what looks like a spinning blur swiftly buzz right through and it breaks a good chunk of them apart like a flying saw-blade* HUH?!

As soon as it came, like the wind, it left. I was paused for a moment before I got back on my hooves. At first, I felt grateful that something tipped the odds in my favor, but then I thought-

Flash: DARN IT! I wanted to do that myself!

Not to interrupt myself, but it was then that those same three stallions from before showed up to help me with the rest of the living dummies. It was Private Second Classes Heavyweight and Thunderclap, and their squad leader, Specialist Shining Armor…. I mouthed off a Specialist earlier…whoops. I’m surprised I didn’t get chewed out earlier for that.

SONG: Multi Man Melee 1 (Super Smash Bros. Melee) www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivuOaU…

Shining Armor: Nice day for solo training, ain’t it, Cadet? Good thing I had the same idea in mind!

Flash: Huh?! You?! Did you do that?!

Shining Armor: Do what?

Flash: That thing that just broke all of those wooden things! Did you do that?!

Shining Armor: I don’t know what you’re talking about. We just got here. But since we’re here, how about we get some training done together. You look like you could use some help!

Flash: Yeah, no thanks! I’d rather do this myself, sir!

Shining Armor: Yeah, right. *All 3 jump down to the grounds in front of Flash and take a battle position* Formation Delta 4!

Heavyweight & Thunderclap: ROGER!

Flash: Hey! What do you think you’re doing!? I had this under control!

Thunderclap: Shut up and join in if you want to fight them so bad!

Flash:…..Nrgh… Fine then! (The one time I TRY to do something on my own and I STILL get others helping me!) *Picks staff back up and hovers above them* On your mark, Mr. Captain!

Shining Armor: That’s SPECIALIST Mr. Captain to you, Cadet!

Flash: You’re a Specialist? Oh…..

Shining Armor: Formation… GO!!! *The 4 of them proceed with the formation and each take down a good majority of the dummies until there is but one left* And HALT!!! *They all stop except for Flash* Hmm?

Flash: *Dives at the dummy* HAAAAAAA!!! *Gets stopped* ACK!! Huh?!

Shining Armor: I said “HALT”!!! Learn to listen, Cadet!

Flash: Rgh… Sorry… But why leave this one intact?!

Shining Armor: Because that one is for interrogation.

All 3: WHUUUU?!

Shining Armor: *Sigh* Didn’t you read the manual for the placement test?! You ALWAYS leave one enemy remaining and capture them for questioning. It’s also a chance that the enemy you were about to defeat was actually a spy working for you. You need to be ABSOLUTELY sure you have all the facts and information before dealing the final blow!

Flash: Oh… well I…

Shining Armor: You didn’t read the book, did you?

Flash: No, I didn’t even take a placement test.

Shining Armor: That’s because you’re only a cadet. You take the placement test after a set amount of training time.

Flash: Oh! Okay. So what do I do until then?

Shining Armor: You get ready is what you do. You’ll be taking it at the end of this month. So study up and train harder. *Tosses him “A Book On Being A Royal Guard That You Should Read”* You got a week to memorize it and get ready. Otherwise you can forget becoming a Royal Guard! Got it?!

Flash: *Catches the book* Y-Yes, sir!

Thunderclap: I was able to scrape by it with a C+.

Heavyweight: B- for me.

Shining Armor: Seriously?! You guys needed a LOT more study-time I can tell. I aced it with flying colors! And that was before they switched from the old system to this new one! Anyways, I’m curious about you. What’s your name, Cadet?

Flash: Cadet… Flash! Flash Sentry!

Shining Armor: Flash Sentry, eh? Fine then. I’m Specialist Shining Armor. You’ve already met Second Class Privates Heavyweight and Thunderclap.

Flash: Yeah. We’ve met. So why’d you guys help me anyways?

Thunderclap: Well Shining heard a voice call him and tell him to hurry to the training ground. We just followed.

Heavyweight: We were gonna train ourselves anyway, so we figured we’d help out.

Flash: Well thanks, but I had it under control myself.

Shining Armor: This coming from the guy who we saw get knocked back and forth like a racquetball?

Flash: NRCK! *Sizzles a little and sighs* Okay, fine. You got me.

Shining Armor: Keep in mind about being a Royal Guard, Flash. It’s not just about protecting the lives of the Royal Family, but also looking out for your fellow soldiers. We do our best to make sure the job gets done correctly but with as few casualties as possible! Understand?

Flash:…..*Nods* Yeah, I understand.

Shining Armor: Good, then if you wanna be ready for that placement exam, you’re gonna need to go through some serious dirt to prepare! How about we help out?

Flash: Thanks, but no thanks. What good would I be to the princess if I had to rely on everyone? I’ve had to let somepony show up to save my flank too many times before. If I can’t handle a situation on my own, then I’m as low as the speck of dirt that Prince Blueblood calls me! And I am NOT about to let him be right! So with all due respect, I’m fine on my own.

Shining Armor: *Sigh* You’re just like my sister… Well alright. If you’re serious about it, then fine. Just know that my offer’s still opened. *They walk over to separate parts of the training ground to begin their solo training* Let’s start it up!

SCORE: Hell Prominence (Super Mario Galaxy) www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISXfkD…

Over the next week, I continued training either on my own on my down time, went through the various drills that our drill sergeant put me and everypony else through, and studied hard through the manual that Shining Armor gave me. Interesting enough, everything that I was hitting did the same thing that those training dummies did and came to life to hit me back! Needless to say, I got clobbered… a lot. But I was determined to fight back and win on my own. Though I still can’t help but wonder why MY targets were the only ones that were coming to life. Was some unicorn using an animation spell? Were the targets haunted or something?!

Drill Sergeant: CADET! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING ON THE GROUND?! THE PRINCESS IS NOT HERE! WHO ARE YOU BOWING TO?!

Flash: Nrrrgh!!! *Struggles to get up* Sir?! Why am I the only one who’s targets keep doing this to?!

Drill Sergeant: I DON’T KNOW AND I DON’T CARE! YOU KNOW WHAT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO DO, SO DO IT!!! GET ON YOUR HOOVES AND BREAK THEM! MOVE IT, CADET! MOOOOVE IIIIIT!!!!

Flash: NGH!!! *Gets up and picks up staff* Sir, YES SIR!!! *Starts again*

My mind was on the fritz. I thought I was gonna lose it just after the first few weeks. It was definitely a lot tougher than I had imagined. But after several days of getting knocked down and chewed out, after every failure, after every body-breakdown, after every dirty meal, and after every hour of making my brain explode, things eventually became clear when something WEIRD happened!

END OF TRACK